Undiscovered Galaxy

Fuck all of this. I don’t even know what I was thinking. I lost my best friend for a one night stand that I didn’t even think through. On top of that, I told her I’d give her her space seeing as it was completely my fault and such, so I lost all of my friends from school. I literally have no one there for me anymore. 

I know I’m the one who hurt her in the first place, but how come no one even asked me how I felt about all of this? Nobody except my mom knows that I was crying for about 4 hours while I told my best friend the truth. I couldn’t hold it in and I knew I was going to lose her, but I preferred hurting her now and losing her, than keeping a fake friendship and hurting her more, later on. I know what I got myself into the minute I thought “I need to tell her the truth..” but how come no one was there for me? In the end, all of my friends were completely fine with me leaving and still to this day, they won’t even look at me in the eye. Even though I hurt my best friend, don’t I have feelings too? How come I don’t get someone that’ll listen to me and help me get through this? It’s just as hard for me to get through this as it is for her, but she has people all around her supporting her every move, and I don’t even get a look in the eye. 

Why is it that when a relationship gets messy, and that one of them cheats, that it’s the person they cheated with that has no one for him or her? He or she was just as hurt as the person who was cheated on. They could’ve thought that the person was going to stay with them. They could’ve thought that that person wasn’t even in a relationship. They could’ve thought that for once, someone would love them instead him or her always giving everything that he or she has, but no, it doesn’t matter because it’s their fault so they don’t get the right to have anyone there for them.